Who Taught These Kids to Debate, Anyway?

Yes, I coach debaters and as a judge once told one of my teams, "Debate IS a full contact sport."
I was bombarded today with their debate skills, just without their brains, hearts or forethought.
Here goes. I am particularly close to one of the board members (our system of captains) as she is friends with my daughter, she has been with me for three years and we are a lot alike. She tells me everything and helps me know how to relate to my teen daughter. It's like having a double agent...except she's not enemies with either side.
Evidently, some students have perceived this as favoritism and have developed jealousy. I can respect that. It's not intended and her grade is earned just like everyone else's, but I can see their perspective.
That's not the problem. The problem is one (or two) students took it upon themselves to start a petition to "reform" her or "remove" her from office for lack of leadership ability. Hello. This is NOT a democracy. We do not allow for impeachment. And have any of them heard the phrase, "Those who live in glass houses?"
See, they could all use their leadership skills more and I am there to help them LEARN...how to argue and how to be good citizens. It's all the same with me. What they did was petty and personal and that student was extremely hurt. They named no one else who could use a little "reforming" and even diminished her particular events.
Now the kicker. They actually offered an ultimatum that I do as they say or they will quit.
EXCUSE ME? Who has no leadership now?
I am so mad I could have a coronary on the spot. After two hours of conflict resolution, it turned out to not be as they had described. They claimed "everyone" agreed so imagine my surprise when student after student walked into class saying, "Um, Mrs. S, I have nothing to do with that. Why is my name on it?"
We've really got to work on our people skills, no?

Things You Should NEVER Say to Your Teen Daughter

Now you'll see why I'm surprised "they" let me have a kid.



10. (Driving in car to school) Is that a zit on your chin? Here's some cream for it.

9. (In reference to a smart boy) But he's so...sweet and he has such a bright future.

8. (Noticing newly tight jeans) Have you not been doing workouts in softball lately? Or are you sure you want to supersize that meal?

7. (In front of her friends) Did you brush your teeth this morning? Or did you take your meds last night?

6. (Across a crowded Target) Honey, what size cup are you now?

5. Who needs a boyfriend? They just suck up all your studying time.

4. Why do I have to wear a bra just to drop you off at the movies?

3. Just think, 50% did WORSE than you!

2. (In front of daughter to one of her friends...preferably a boy) Hey, are you the one I read about on Facebook last night?

And the #1 thing you should NEVER say to your Teen Daughter is...

1. Wow. You look so much like I did at your age. I bet you're going to look just like me when you're older!

It's a Miracle I Have a Kid!

This is how I spend many of my weekends...at endless debate tournaments...with caffeinated kids whose vocabularies are bigger than mine...and that's saying something.

Here's what a typical conversation might go.

Student: Hey, Mrs. S. What's the veil of ignorance.
Me: blank expression, wracking brain for some answer that has a semblance of truth, coming up empty
Student 2: It's impossible to achieve in that it assumes all bias is removed which cannot be done.
Me: Yeah, that's what I meant.
Student: Skeptical look
Student 2: Furthermore, most countries who belong to the ICC cannot claim to have a veil of ignorance.
Me: The what CC?

Yep. Not pretty. So my dear asst. coach and I look like this by the end of the first night. Yep, she's a lot younger. Me? I barely made it home by midnight that night and returned at the crack of dawn.

After spending all those hours with kids, it's a miracle I ever had one of my own...or that I was allowed to. But that's another post.

Living for Summer

The Honey and I are trying to decide what we're going to do this summer. We can't really decide until the Pumpkin's select softball schedule is set and my team finishes national qualifiers at the end of this month. That being said, here are our two options.

Plan #1: We travel again to Mexico with our friends who got married/attended said wedding last year. Hmmmmmm. An all-inclusive tropical resort with waitstaff at my beck and call. Food prepared just for me 24-7. Sandy beaches, amazing excursions full of repelling, hiking, zip-lining and history.

Plan #2: We take a roadtrip passing through Arkansas to visit the Honey's brother, Springfield, MO, where he went to college and Columbia, MO, where he grew up, and then heading to Chicago. I'm not sure what there is to do there, but it has to be awesome. We'll possibly tool over to Detroit and maybe hit Indianapolis on the way back through St. Louis, Eureka Springs and Hot Springs. Hours and hours in the car with a stack of books and decadent magazines that I refuse to read unless we are traveling.

For those of you who know me, you know I've already begun both itineraries.

Yep, I'm living for summer in February.

My Own Version of Freecycle

I love clothes...and shoes. But not just any clothes...really nice clothes ON SALE! You see, it's all a game with me. (Yes, I'm a little competitive.) Here's how it works. If I pay full price, "they" win. For every portion of a discount I get, I "get" more "points" and no they aren't real and you can't redeem them at any store that I know of. It's just a great feeling of satisfaction. I love that tickly feeling in my stomach as I realize there's an extra 10% off the redlines...or today is half off of half day...or coupon weekend at New York and Company.

I also have clothes I can't seem to part with. Now, let me say that I am not the same size I was just a few years ago. So, I have a collection of suits from Dillard's that I bought for at least 75% off...because I could...and they are mostly 1's and 3's. I am NOT a 1 nor a 3!

What to do. What to do.

So, I take 8 of them up to the school and the girls on my team played dress up and went home with new clothes for the upcoming national qualifier. I loved the look on their faces. They didn't even think it was geeky to like my old suit which are all in perfect condition, by the way.

Now that there's a little space in my closet...

Great News...I have a job next year.

Yeah, anyone reading that title will wonder what I've been up to. A job next year? Of course. Have I been shopping around for a new one? Nope. Oh, but read on.

So, I got one of those email messages that requested my presence at a meeting with a counselor and an AP to discuss a class I teach. Now, it's not a total surprise that it's up for discussion due to the 4X4 requirements for kids to graduate, but I'd been told recently that we weren't changing anything for next year.

Long story short (who me?), I was told the class was out to be replaced with another one. Wait. My baby? I birthed that class. I wrote all the curriculum FROM SCRATCH with no TEKS and no guidelines. But it's my baby. I've coddled it through collicky six weeks and countless bouts with vocabularyitis and freshmenitis. No, not my baby!!!!!!! Call CPS...this has to be abuse.

But that wasn't really the issue, was it? No, and if you know me, you know that it's not that I won't be teaching this FAB class next year. It's not even that my baby is being kidnapped and put out to pasture. Nope, it's that NO ONE TOLD ME!

Maintaining as much control as I could, I questioned #1 the length of time this had been in the works (a while) and #2 why I hadn't been told (we didn't want to upset you in case it didn't happen) while they professed their appreciation for me and that it hadn't been "hidden" from me (see answer to question #2).

I barely made it back to my room before bursting into tears. I sobbed to the Honey. I sobbed to the friends. I sobbed to my laptop. And then I dried my tears, put on fresh makeup and got ready to spend the evening recruiting 8th graders for next year.

Hey, I'll just focus on my team next year and kick everyone's tail...and teach that other class with my eyes closed. At the recruitment for the FIRST time ever, kids were looking FOR US!!

The upside? They did say I had a job next year.

Duh!

Got Coffee? Maybe now you will!

Here's a link to try to win a fab Keurig coffee brewer. I hope you don't win....I want to win REALLY, REALLY badly.